I Swear It Jumped Out & Bit Me.
True events that actually did happen. to me. funny and owey.
1. i tripped and tumbled down a flight of stairs and hit my head on every metal bar on the railing on the way down. maybe i have a magnet in my head? and then i got stuck inbetween 2 of them at the bottom. got butter?
2. i accidently stood on a hockey ball coming at me at speed during a game (instead of trying to stop it with my stick) and twisted my ankle... and then proceeded to play a 3 day tournament on it neway. sumhow that seemed to help. weird me.
3. i came across a hanging chain cordening off a driveway at school that we had to get over during a PE lesson (stupid PE).. and i decided to do wat everyone else was doing and jump over it like i was doing hurdles. unfortunately sum stupid dummyhead decided they would stand on it... the exact moment i was jumping it. sending me toppling forward... face first to the concrete. i dont like chains ne more.
4. i was playing twister at my bestest friends' (commonly known as "my friend" on this bloggy thing... she has a name. Steff... yea) birthday, and i guess the right hand on blue with the left leg on yellow wasnt workin' for me... coz i got really twisted and literally twised my right knee outta its socket (now thats comittment)
it caused me to have athroscopic knee surgery the following year. fun times. and i not like twister no more.
5. i went down the luge (kinda like go karting with nothing holding u in but u do have a helmet.... Thank God!) for my birthday with sum friends, and decided i was brave enuf to try the advanced track that had a huuuge hill that u jump off, fly for a bit, then go really really fast down till u feel like ur gonna crash!... not that i would know. onacounta i opted for a more scenic route. as in..... head first into the concrete track...... then rolled round and round and round down the hill.... hitting my head all the way...... till i stopped. that was 4 years ago, and i still have the scars to prove it. steff says it looks like a leech. i didnt like my birthday that year.
6. i fell up a flight of stairs. crazey but so easily done.
7. i fell down yet another flight of stairs, picked myself up, tried to regain wat was left of my dignity..... and proceeded to the next flight of stairs....where i had de ja vou and fell down them too.
i seem to be constantly at war with "the stairs" (gives a evil stare..grr)
i will win this battle! they may have started this fight... but i will win this war!!!!!
8. i seem to walk into doors alot. i swear they were open, yet when i try to walk through the doorway, the doors seem to always try and bite me. oww they hurt!... i must have a magnet for doors too.
9. i was at work, standing by a wall with my head down, reaching for something... and for sum reason i thought i could magically merge through a concrete wall with my head. so i kept walking closer as i reached for my item.... and realised..... walls do not come in peace.
the aliems mite..... but walls most certainly do not. Ouchey head.
10. i was at steff's house having one of those home made iceblock thingeeys (that u lick on a hot day) ...k... u know how wen u go skiing u dont lick the chairlift pole? and u know why rite? k... think that.... with me and my ice block... i seriously could NOT get my tongue off the damn iceblock. i was even trying to shake the damn thing off my tongue with no hands (like a dog wen he comes outta water and drys himself) i was pulling on it too... and my tongue was doing that cartooney thing how it stretches itself more than it looks like it should. steff was just pissing herself laughing. hmm...apparently if ur stuck to sumthing frozen pee helps....eww (shudders) bad thought bad thought!! i opted to just slowly let it defrost off my tongue in the sun. seemed more hygenic. wat a day.
True events that actually did happen. to me. funny and owey.
1. i tripped and tumbled down a flight of stairs and hit my head on every metal bar on the railing on the way down. maybe i have a magnet in my head? and then i got stuck inbetween 2 of them at the bottom. got butter?
2. i accidently stood on a hockey ball coming at me at speed during a game (instead of trying to stop it with my stick) and twisted my ankle... and then proceeded to play a 3 day tournament on it neway. sumhow that seemed to help. weird me.
3. i came across a hanging chain cordening off a driveway at school that we had to get over during a PE lesson (stupid PE).. and i decided to do wat everyone else was doing and jump over it like i was doing hurdles. unfortunately sum stupid dummyhead decided they would stand on it... the exact moment i was jumping it. sending me toppling forward... face first to the concrete. i dont like chains ne more.
4. i was playing twister at my bestest friends' (commonly known as "my friend" on this bloggy thing... she has a name. Steff... yea) birthday, and i guess the right hand on blue with the left leg on yellow wasnt workin' for me... coz i got really twisted and literally twised my right knee outta its socket (now thats comittment)
it caused me to have athroscopic knee surgery the following year. fun times. and i not like twister no more.
5. i went down the luge (kinda like go karting with nothing holding u in but u do have a helmet.... Thank God!) for my birthday with sum friends, and decided i was brave enuf to try the advanced track that had a huuuge hill that u jump off, fly for a bit, then go really really fast down till u feel like ur gonna crash!... not that i would know. onacounta i opted for a more scenic route. as in..... head first into the concrete track...... then rolled round and round and round down the hill.... hitting my head all the way...... till i stopped. that was 4 years ago, and i still have the scars to prove it. steff says it looks like a leech. i didnt like my birthday that year.
6. i fell up a flight of stairs. crazey but so easily done.
7. i fell down yet another flight of stairs, picked myself up, tried to regain wat was left of my dignity..... and proceeded to the next flight of stairs....where i had de ja vou and fell down them too.
i seem to be constantly at war with "the stairs" (gives a evil stare..grr)
i will win this battle! they may have started this fight... but i will win this war!!!!!
8. i seem to walk into doors alot. i swear they were open, yet when i try to walk through the doorway, the doors seem to always try and bite me. oww they hurt!... i must have a magnet for doors too.
9. i was at work, standing by a wall with my head down, reaching for something... and for sum reason i thought i could magically merge through a concrete wall with my head. so i kept walking closer as i reached for my item.... and realised..... walls do not come in peace.
the aliems mite..... but walls most certainly do not. Ouchey head.
10. i was at steff's house having one of those home made iceblock thingeeys (that u lick on a hot day) ...k... u know how wen u go skiing u dont lick the chairlift pole? and u know why rite? k... think that.... with me and my ice block... i seriously could NOT get my tongue off the damn iceblock. i was even trying to shake the damn thing off my tongue with no hands (like a dog wen he comes outta water and drys himself) i was pulling on it too... and my tongue was doing that cartooney thing how it stretches itself more than it looks like it should. steff was just pissing herself laughing. hmm...apparently if ur stuck to sumthing frozen pee helps....eww (shudders) bad thought bad thought!! i opted to just slowly let it defrost off my tongue in the sun. seemed more hygenic. wat a day.
